The warm media bath of the Democratic Convention.

Maureen Dowd and Frank Rich last shared a byline in the summer of 1992, a time when it was novel to report on the party conventions as scripted spectacle. "Meticulous Kabuki dramas," they called them—a notion now so conventional as to invite helplessly absurd utterances from the television personalities who serve as the drama's chorus. On Monday—with Caroline Kennedy approaching the Democrats' podium in Denver and the news having been reiterated 500 times that Uncle Teddy was in town—Alan Colmes found it appropriate to state, "We're going to go right to the stage right now. ... We will show a video and then a surprise speech by Ted Kennedy."

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